Creative non-fiction stuff

Aloria's picture
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This book is a collection of my creative nonfiction assignments from college. 


Mind, I've never written creative nonfiction before, nor have I really thought of memoirs as really anything interesting. So, if it's boring, or not quite what you were expecting, keep in mind that these were my first attempts.

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I was skeptical about the

gorzek's picture
8
I was skeptical about the subject matter of this piece, but really, it's very engaging. It's an interesting exploration of identity, and doesn't come off as cliched or heavy-handed. There were a few minor editing issues. Those are Word documents with a capital W, for instance. And "contradictory" is the word, not "contradictive."

But I really liked this.

This is a really friggin' long sentence!

"So I signed up for a class called "Creative Non-Fiction" even though I didn't have a clue what the title of the class could possibly mean, however, I was determined to find out and to learn something, and indeed I did learn many things but not what I'd expected to learn, nor do I think it was exactly what the teacher was trying to teach."

Clearly your prof should've spent an extra hour covering use of the period.  I almost had a stroke reading this sentence.  It was either the sentence or that eight ball.

"That question was, "Why

8
"That question was, "Why should anyone give a damn about Jimbob's seventh grade experiences and what he thinks of them today? Was his life really that interesting back then?"" 

You don't need to put your question in quotes.  The reader knows it's your question.  Drop the quotes, drop "That question was," and just use your question.  More direct.

"
I half believe in that ancient curse, "May your life be interesting," only because when writing, I inflict the most amusing and interesting situations on my characters and they generally survive, but they usually come out bleeding." --This is a really good sentence.

"
When I write, I imagine myself as [a] doorway through which my imagination is channeled, giving others a glimpse into the universes that multiply like amebas in my head."   --Missed an article.

Like Gorzek, I was skeptical when I began this piece.  To be honest, one of my first thoughts upon seeing you use the Instant Messenger format was, "I'm not going to be able to get through this."  You surprised me.  The speaker's tone is almost self-important but balanced beautifully with a big-picture self-awareness that she channels into writing.  This is very accessible and relatable. 

Two points of concern I had:  1)  For such an engaging personal essay, it lacked any straight humor.  Crack a couple jokes.  It helps the reader feel more comfortable in order to connect with the speaker.  2)  A major point of the essay, it seems to me, was how the speaker used writing to reconnect with people and thus herself.  Sort of a going out to find where home is.  You mention briefly reading something on LiveJournal but not in any detail and then you never return to the subject.  Though the exposition is strong, I wanted to see some more on how writing helped you reconnect with people.  Even if just some sparse conversation with a professor, a particularly honest critique you received or gave.  Anything really.  You had me going up until the end.  If there was another page or two added on, I would've kept going.

Anowalk really likes to give

gorzek's picture
Anowalk really likes to give long comments. He's cool.

To be blatantly honest, I

Pythia's picture
4
To be blatantly honest, I didn't like it. It just didn't pull me in. It felt like somethign that I've read a lot of variations on over the years, and it wasn't quite unique enough to stand out form the crowd. I just thought it seemed kind of...bland.
I don't think it was the subject that was the problem, but more the writing itself. I think the writing was very simple and plain, and it kind of lacked a unique personal voice that it seemed like such a personal piece should have.

Over editing is the reason

Aloria's picture
Over editing is the reason for that, I suspect.

Before I critque...

inkwell's picture
4
I first want say how difficult it must be to write something like this that sort of lays your guts out to dry. I make attempts at this sort of writing often but what little I have written is too personal to share so bravo! and kudos! for that.

On the other hand I have to agree with most of the comments here. It started off strong but slightly after the paragraph discussing the creative non-fiction class I lost interest and didn't want to really read much more. It picked up in parts after that but on a whole I think that it's just missing that something that makes a person want to continue reading. Do I know what that something is? Not really, which is why I don't write this way, but I know it when I read it.  This has the potential to be more than it is.

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